Pantini Parade
“Can I buy you ladies a drink?”
One of the most popular questions of all time. Also one of my favorite questions of all time. Especially when it’s from the guy that just took over the daily champagne saber at my favorite place, The St. Regis. Every time you visit, you have no idea quite what the night will hold, but you know it will be good, regardless.
Jamie Lee and I joined he and his girlfriend and another couple in the lounge. He immediately ordered two of everything, and cocktails, and a pour of 1942 for everyone. We quickly learned they were visiting from Jersey, and owned a restaurant, and were all intermingled by way of work, family, mafia possible (kidding…sort of), and were fascinating and hilarious.
“I spent $5,000.00 on cash tips for lap dances last night,” his girlfriend shared.
Her boyfriend quickly responded, “That was MY $5,000.00 that you stole out of my pocket!”
After a couple of hours of chatting, he asked if we’d ever had a Pantini. I was not sure if this was a cocktail or a position of some sort. I replied no, with hesitation and fascination.
"Marcus!" he said to our server, "Let's get some bottle service over here...with vodka!"
"Yes sir, what mixers would you like?"
"None, thanks. Just the bottle, a bucket of ice, and six glasses. I'll handle the rest!"
My mind began to wonder how I could politely back out of drinking a straight vodka martini, but I decided to just let the night play out and deal with it later.
He began pouring the vodka and ice into the shaker, telling us how people from near and far request this drink at their restaurant. (BTW: As I'm typing this I can't believe it took me this long to figure out what a Pantini was). Suddenly, his girlfriend stood up, slid off her panties, and handed them to him. He shoved them into the shaker and shook it one final time.
Jamie Lee and I stared in disbelief.
He poured six Pantinis right there in front of us. He passed out the glasses to the table while patrons around us began taking photos.
Everyone held up their glass to give a “cheers,” and I slowly lifted mine up, wondering how I could make this glass vanish into thin air.
"Umm, may I....respectfully decline?"
They slowly started to laugh. Thank God, I thought, comedy to the rescue again!
Everyone sat their glasses down, and he pulled the panties out and shoved them into the bottle of Tito's. He then asked Marcus if he would take the bottle up to their room. He obliged.
Another hour or so passed, and they had to leave for dinner. I whispered, "Hey Marcus, you might want to just throw these glasses straight into the trash can." He laughed, and walked away with the tray, to who knows where.
Sometimes I flash back to one of my goals before deciding to write. I remember penning this sentence: To live a fun and adventurous life, and to create memories worth writing about. And then things like Pantinis present themselves to me. So what do I do? I write about them, but I don't drink them. That counts for something.
